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I had an awesome walk this afternoon. We joined up with my collie friends (there are 3 now) and they all walked (while I raced, and Tessa did some racing with me) through the woods. Great fun.

Gizzy got her bath tonight. She must have known it was bath night because when she got back from our walk she found the loosiest dirtiest dirt in the drive, and just rolled and dug herself in. Was she ever filthy She wasn't even allowed on the couch. Now's she white and fluffy.

Dan Can't wait to see you. Mike told me you're coming in this coming Saturday. You'll get to enjoy the Ray Pirate family. All the kids will be here for a pirate family gathering.............Sparky T. Ray....................................

Sparky's right... As this weekend comes to an end, we're preparing for a busy week of getting ready for family. As with any family gathering there are feelings of dread/work/anticipation. I'm starting to work on my lists.

Good to hear from you Merryl and Linda. Hope things are going well in Ohio. Are you still getting out in the boat any, or is it up for the season?

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i canapos;t sleep. Partly coz iapos;m ill, but also bcoz iapos;m thinking about you. Iapos;m proud of myself to have come this far and made such progress from therapy. And somehow, i feel like sharing it with you. If iapos;m been in therapy for 3 months that also means that i havent heard from you for the same amount of time. But i still have you running around in my mind everyday.

�

for the first time after all these years, iapos;ve come to realized that iapos;ve never been in love with anyone. So that means i wasnt even in love with you. My therapist have asked "have you been in love with anyone?" before and iapos;ve always given you as my answer. But last week, i had an epiphany, i suddenly realized that iapos;ve never been in love with you. I just loved how you gave me hope, that was the only time i felt worthy as a human being.

�

that all made sense now, how could i be in love with a large kid? iapos;ve always thought that youapos;ll be a good parent from the way you "parented" me, but when i picture myself having a family with you, i didnt like the thought of having to take care of a large and a small son. And how could i love a person who keeps things from me, lying to me and bullshitting me all the time? someone who plays stupid games to make me feel jealous or to raise your level of attractiveness in my eyes?

�

sad to say my dear. But i saw right through everything. But i put up with it and played along. Just bcoz i wanted the hope back into my life. Iapos;ve also realized that iapos;ve strung you along almost as much as you did. But i didnt lie like you did.

�

oh, by the way, iapos;ve known about your affair with alice long time before i confronted you with it. I only did�confronted you�for the fun of it, since allan asked me about the relationship between the both of you, i thought mayb i could catch you lying again. Iapos;ve�withheld that little morsel of information since oct 2005. And in case youapos;re wondering who shared that juicy info, itapos;s your dream girl.

�

you probably bragged to her about dating alice just to raise your self worth and make yourself seem more desirable to her. Itapos;s like "hey, if a cute girl like her likes me than i must be really something right?" anyway, iapos;ve already knew something was�going on between the both of you even�before your dream girl let the cat out of the bag.

�

i guess iapos;ve never had the privilege of being stupid or ignorant.

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Itapos;s been over a year since I last posted.� WOW� Where did the time go?� Itapos;s been one insane year.

I have not been absent for a year, though.� Iapos;ve been actively reading House fanfic and posting comments.� The House communities have really helped me keep sane.

I have been writing fanfic, too.� Just havenapos;t posted anything for a long time.� I have a lot of unfinished pieces that I havenapos;t had time to complete.� Family stuff, health issues, and the errant tropical storm have occupied my time.� I hope to be a little better with posting this year ... If I can remember how to do it correctly.� Weapos;ll see how it goes.



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The conference went really well, this morning. It really wasnapos;t about the talks - it was the networking opportunity. The journey there was alright for the most part, up until we got stuck within the same circuit of the one-way-system in the city center for half an hour. Getting back out again was only slightly less adventurous.

Back out to see Ian Rankin now, and then off to work. Hoping this sicky thing goes away by tomorrow.

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Iapos;ve really enjoyed being on campus every day, and I worked with some wonderful people, who I am sad to be leaving...

but I am mostly thrilled about moving on to being a school media specialist, two years ahead of schedule.

my luck seems to be as up and down as my personality, either bringing incredible highs (this) or incredible lows (summer)...

but I am so happy to be approaching a crest

life is starting to make a pattern, and I am starting to maybe feel like a grown up.

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I picked up a carton of ice cream today for my usual stash...and it was on sale. I was enjoying it just now, and when I went to put it away, I took a quick look at the label. Now, Iapos;m used to seeing "Available as Edyapos;s ice cream east of the Rockies" on cartons of Dreyerapos;s, but tonight, it read "Available as Edyapos;s Frozen Dairy Product east of the Rockies".

"Frozen dairy dessert"? Did they change something?

Sure enough...the number one ingredient on the label is now Whey, and not milk, skim milk, or cream. Iapos;m not sure how many are aware that the US actually has "Standards of Identity" for a wide variety of "common" foods, that set certain minimums/limits as to what can or cannot be called "ice cream" or "cheese" (which is why all those "fake" cheeses are "cheese products"). According to 21 CFR 135.110(a)(2):

 Ice cream contains not less than 1.6 pounds of total solids to  the gallon, and weighs not less than 4.5 pounds to the gallon. Ice cream  contains not less than 10 percent milkfat, nor less than 10 percent  nonfat milk solids, except that when it contains milkfat at 1 percent  increments above the 10 percent minimum, it may contain the following  milkfat-to-nonfat milk solids levels...

I know the price of milk fat has been going up for quite some time (itapos;s why the price of milk has gone up so much), but yikes, I no longer have ice cream Now, it tastes more or less the same, but it did seem just a little less creamy than before...Iapos;ll have to remember to take a closer look at the labels in the future.

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I want ... "2. To go back to bangkok (mum has plans before october ends, and it kind of looks like it doesnapos;t include me, sigh)"

WOOO�It includes me after all. And we shall be leaving tonight.
And I am not yet packed, and we are leaving the house in less than an hour.
And I am still writing this stupid entry.

Although I wonapos;t be able to feel the thrill of accessing AISIS when the clock hits 12:01 am on Tuesday morning, I shall replace it with the thrill of shopping endlessly (of course, not really, itapos;s with limit ... But) at Bkk. Yaaaay.

Will be back to internet life on Wednesday. :D
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